An atheist at a Christian retreat: a test of tolerance

 Group hike: escaping the sun

I am back in England,  over the jet lag, finally, and enjoying the mild temperatures and regular bouts of rain.  However I still have a few tales left from my time in the 'Land of the Free'. This one goes back to that dangerous territory of religion, time to tread carefully!

Those of you who are familiar with my beliefs, may be surprised to find that I spent a weekend in the Arizona at a Christian retreat.  No,  I have not found Jesus in depths of the Valley of the Sun,  but it did leave a lasting impression.

Let's start with how on earth I ended up there.  It all starts by being part of a volunteer group at Arizona State University.  The group met weekly and took part in community based events to help vulnerable members of society, like the many people who are homeless in the states or to clean up the local park.  These are activities I par-took as a believer in humanity and showing kindness to others.  I have to say that there was a definite Christian undertone to the group but it wasn't overwhelming.   Sitting silently and respectively while others pray is fine with me.  It also had some really cool reflection activities, which I am on board with.  I like taking time to myself to relax and focus on something positive in my life, I  think its healthy way to approach life. I'd also made some really great friends there, eating pizza and practising my face painting skills occasionally.

Anyway the group have this annual event where they spend a weekend in northern Arizona on a 'retreat'. Sharath has been a member of the group for all 4 of his years at college and had never been on this weekend away. Graduating this year meant it was his last chance to go.  I had my apprehensions about going,  I sensed it wasn't going to be a weekend I would feel completely at home on. I was willing to suck it up and go along with it though, as it was important to Sharath.    I figured spending a weekend with a bunch of people I knew I got along well with, would be fine even if there was too many mentions of the big guy in the sky for my liking.

It was a strange weekend.  There were moments where I was having fun and enjoying myself, spending time with interesting new people,  then there were moments where I felt down right uncomfortable,  like an outsider. I have these very different opinions,  that everyone else was oblivious to and in that environment I didn't feel comfortable telling everyone that actually I'm not a believer in God.   In my opinion there doesn't need to be a God or a religious text, with rules and traditions to follow in order to be kind and love people and the world around you.  It just takes an open mind,  where you are open to trying to understand things form other peoples perspective, willing to challenge your preconceptions.  A level of emotional intelligence,  you could call it.  

I don't believe in God but I do believe that human beings are good, we just get misunderstood by each other and interpret the world around us from a narrow, self orientated, perspective.  Its these acts of tunnel vision that creates the tension and animosity between us all.  Its what makes the pursuit of knowledge and the need to communicate so important.  I may well have it all wrong but that's my two cents.

My favourite memory of the weekend was escaping with Sharath for a few hours on the Saturday night and getting to feel completely comfortable once more, as we shared our thoughts on it all.  It was male and female separate dorm rooms too, which made me feel like I was back in high school, so hanging out in the car really was the perfect place to spend some time together. 

Overall I feel like I discovered that I had a lot in common with these guys in terms of our ideals and morals, which probably why they made such good friendships but I'll stick to my guns on the God element. Perhaps I'm also a little less scared by organised religion but think I'll be staying clear of retreats in the future.